Silent Prayers of Dementia

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There are days when the rays
light the path to expectation
a glimmer of understanding
through a light touch
it thrills my heart
and lets me know
I am not alone

Many are the afternoons
when the clouds gather
I wait to see the break
…oft so many times
they will darken
anxious storms
are near

Lonely nights stretch into days
restless waiting for dreams
exhausted with counting
mirage of shadows
through meshed
confusion my
voice is silent

In this blackness a silent soul
finds an arbour of conveyance
through the dark He walks
holding my hand and
hearing my prayers
silent assurance
set free

~

KJS

A Death Sentence To Memory

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We take for granted occurring thoughts that travel through our minds highway everyday! Miles of crowed lanes, speeding and passing, “I wonder why’s” and “I should have” but what about those REMEMBER WHENS? To someone diagnosed with Dementia, these are privileged, high valued precious moments, that may only take place on rare occasions, sadly becoming less and less with each passing day!

…It has been a little over six months since my mother has been diagnosed with MIXED AGGRESSIVE DEMENTIA. To see it written in black and white signed by the physician was startling, but witnessing it starting to play out in my mother’s daily life is heartbreaking, and excruciatingly life changing.

A Text book case?

Statistics show that this horrific disease is occurring in younger people everyday! this is both terrifying and alarming! I continue to review charts, graphs, and I refuse to let mom be just a chart, a number, another statistic, yes she has been handed a death sentence of MIXED AGGRESSIVE DEMENTIA but this does not mean her life has to stop and end without her dreams coming true! Educating ones self and creating awareness is one of the best swords in fighting depression with this disease! Every person that is afflicted with this demon is affected differently, no two are the same. The end result may be the same but the road and corners, trials, tests, and fears are different with each individual. I have worked and continue to work as a Caregiver with Alzheimer and Dementia, I witness this demon first hand, and pray for a cure everyday!

Find what avenues bring relaxation and release of sharing thoughts together…

Taking my mom for drives is the time when she seems to open up to me in her early stages of dementia. Driving back from a baby shower celebrating her great granddaughter mom turned to me and said, “Kathy I’m scared, I don’t know what is happening to me” I said, I know mom it is hard” I proceeded to share with her again how the doctor said her memory is going little by little, and some days faster than others. Mom shared her fears of her memory loss how she struggles remembering names, and what she did yesterday; “I want to go back home Kathy before I forget” I wept silent tears as I reassured my mother I will be here for her! I will do everything in my power to make her wish come true, “I will be with you mom when you cannot remember your stories and treasured memories I know them I will share them with you, together we will walk down this road of dementia together!”

Learning to Let Go

Learning to let go as a daughter, to let mom do things that make her happy, and not what I think is best all the time. Mom may want to wear her same favourite pink outfit five days in a row, let it be, just make sure it is kept laundered and let her wear it. If mom has decided for the time being she wants a brown hand towel hanging in her kitchen instead of the nice blue one that was bought to match, let it be! Educate yourself to learn to let go of your own wants for mom and let her have her own way, as long as it is not hurting her and makes her happy there is no harm.

~

Hints of paths
Decembers snow
my heart knows to follow
when cold winds blow
~
All but one
too many draw near
snowflakes of memories
are melting I fear
~
Captured magic
in moments of time
try to drift over
my journey inclined
~
Traveled often
as not to hide
keeping footprints visible
to hearts passing by
~
Untangling thoughts
of Christmas past
sharing the joys
making them last
~
With arms linked together
hearts trudge through the snow
my mother and I
catching memories as we go

KJS©

Please take a moment to stop by moms dream page
htpp://www.gofundme.com/momsdream

momandme

Time (The Olive Canvas)

I step inside the canvas
For at the end of day,
I observe the room of clutter
From meadows green and gay! ~

My heart sings with the Buntings
I feel their song of cheer
The Chickadees and Kinglets
Bring the olive forest near, ~

Though once inside the wood I know
‘Tis only for a time,
When I shall turn my thoughts around
To the worlds of rapid time.
🌿

Prayer
Dear Heavenly Father,
Days goes by so swiftly, moments but fleeting time. I pray I will make the most of every precious moment. Thank you for your beautiful creation. It is a balm for a weary mind.
Amen

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Loves Consolation

If I should go before thee love

I know twas meant to be,

I love thee more than life itself

I’ll be waiting there for thee!

Within your heart forever be

My love shall guard thy dreams,

I’ll come to you in dark of night

When sleep is robbed from thee.

No tears of sorrow fall for me

Thy heart cut like a knife,

My soul is free I’ll wait for thee

Beside the tree of life!

Kathy J Snow©

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In honour of Remembrance Day. To all who lost their lives fighting for our country. To all who have lost someone , and waiting to meet them over yonder. To the young men and women who continue to serve and fight for freedem. May God bless and keep you.

Reflections (The Sunset)

Reflections of a weary day slowly are put to rest,

a silhouette of fragile beams lay just above the crest,

 

The dustiness of trials and cares are lost within the hues,

delicately ~ the fiery orange ball creates a path of views!

 

Evening skies now celebrate the setting of the sun,

another day is just a turn this day is nearly done!

 

Blaze of colors now convey the final lingering phase,

another day on this ole earth is just a scattered ray!

Kathy J Snow©

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